Recasting Lot’s Wife
In difficult times it鈥檚 natural to want to look back. Our memories can have a way of blurring the edges, so we remember things the way we have categorized them in our minds, without the details that don鈥檛 fit our story. If we鈥檙e remembering warmly, we may blur out聽the parts of the story that don鈥檛 hold up; if it鈥檚 a bitter memory we may leave out the parts that included kindness or helpfulness.聽
We can get bogged down in 鈥渋f only鈥� and 鈥淚 told you so,鈥� tripping ourselves in regret and blame. Too much looking back, we can鈥檛 move forward. Too little, we fail to learn from history and experience. Blame is rarely productive or compassionate. It can be an understandable defensive strategy to help us make sense of difficult or painful reality. If someone else is at fault, it puts distance between those terrible events and our own responsibility, as well as the possibility that we could suffer a similar fate. Sometimes there is clear culpability, and it is important to be honest. Often the real story is unknown.
Classical midrash and commentaries look for culpability to understand the puzzling verse describing the fate of Lot鈥檚 unnamed wife.
讜址转址旨讘值旨讟 讗执砖职讈转旨讜止 诪值讗址讞植专指讬讜 讜址转职旨讛执讬 谞职爪执讬讘 诪侄诇址讞變
Lot鈥檚 wife looked back, and she thereupon turned into a pillar of salt. (Gen 19:26)
If the warning not to look back (19:17) was intended to spare Lot and his fleeing household the consequences of witnessing the destruction wrought on Sodom and聽Gomorra聽(see聽Ramban聽on 19:17)聽or betray any regret about leaving their material belongings or their neighbors, Lot鈥檚 wife鈥檚 backward look was some kind of violation.聽Bereishit聽Rabba聽51 imagines that this unusual punishment was poetic retribution for an imagined sin in Sodom, where she tried to avoid welcoming the angels into their home by asking the neighbors for salt to borrow, thereby informing them of the angels鈥� arrival.聽
Many contemporary writers are puzzled by this theatrical punishment for such a natural impulse. How do we not look back? There is a fascinating body of poetry primarily by women poets whose imaginations were captured by the enigma of Lot鈥檚 wife.
The American Israeli poet who was certainly aware of the rabbinic commentaries, offered a counter narrative in her poem, His Wife:
But it was right that she聽
looked back. Not to be
curious, some lumpy聽
reaching of the mind聽
that turns all shapes to pillars.聽
But to be only who she was聽
apart from them, the place聽
exploding, and herself聽
defined. Seeing them melt聽
to slag heaps and the flames聽
slide into their mouths.聽
Testing her owl lips then,聽
the coolness, till聽
she could taste the salt.聽
In ) Ruti Timor approaches the story with similar empathy, basing her reading on a midrash from Pirkei Derabbi Eliezer 25 which imagines Lot鈥檚 wife (to whom midrash assigns a name, Idit or Irit) overcome with compassion for her married daughters who she fears are remaining in Sodom:
He said to her: Quiet, woman! Do as I say! She was silent. And the angels took them out of the city, and Lot did not say to his wife a word of what they said. He walked sure-footed, and she lagged behind him. Her heart was heavy upon her, she looked back and saw her city, her family, and her property going up in flames. And his wife looked behind, and became a pillar of salt (Gen 19:26). Tear after tear dripped from her eyes, and the tears grew fuller and fuller, stronger and stronger, until they became a pillar of salt. She stumbled and fell, and stirred no more. And Lot did not look back. Our Sages of Blessed Memory said, with salt she sinned and with salt was she punished. And I say, she sinned not, but was punished all the same.
It takes tremendous spiritual work to greet others with compassion or empathy rather than blame. It is harder to see the world in its moral complexity, and to act accordingly.
Dr. Gila Vachman, from Machon Schechter, brought to mind another midrash from Bereishit Rabba on a passage later in the parsha when Hagar fears that Ishmael is dying of thirst in the desert.
:讗诪专 专讘讬 讬讛讜讚讛 讘专讘讬 住讬诪讜谉
,拽驻爪讜 诪诇讗讻讬 讛砖专转 诇拽讟专讙
?!讗诪专讜 诇驻谞讬讜: 专讘讜谞讜 砖诇 注讜诇诐, 讗讚诐 砖讛讜讗 注转讬讚 诇讛诪讬转 讗转 讘谞讬讱 讘爪诪讗, 讗转 诪注诇讛 诇讜 讛讘讗专
?讗诪专 诇讛诐: 注讻砖讬讜 诪讛 讛讜讗, 爪讚讬拽 讗讜 专砖注
.讗诪专讜 诇讜: 爪讚讬拽
.讗诪专 诇讛诐: 讗讬谞讬 讚谉 讗转 讛讗讚诐 讗诇讗 讘砖注转讜
(讘专讗砖讬转 专讘讛 谞讙, 讬讚)
Rabbi Shimon said, 鈥楾he ministering angels leapt to condemn [Ishmael]. They said, Creator of the universe, a person who is destined to kill your children by thirst, will You produce a spring for him?鈥� The Holy One said to them: 鈥榃hat is he right now, righteous or wicked?鈥� They said to him: 鈥楬e is righteous.鈥� God said to them: 鈥業 judge a person only at his present time. 鈥� (Genesis Rabba 53:25).
Here, the midrash reframes judgment as compassion, echoing the lesson implicit in Lot鈥檚 wife鈥檚 story: to see others as they are now, not as we imagine their past or future to be. May we rise beyond our instincts to blame and condemn, to try to greet one another, even those we do not understand, with compassion. May we learn from the past and from the complexity of the human experience, to move forward with empathy towards justice.
The publication and distribution of the聽JTS Torah Commentary聽are made possible by a generous grant from Rita Dee and Harold (锄鈥漧) Hassenfeld.
